Just want to find a place and speak out my feeling

Perhaps I have a generation gap with teenagers nowadays...That's why their "childish" speech make me speechless sometimes...To me,it was childish;to them,it was funny..=.=lll

I shouldn't care about them too much actually because they don't care about me. So it's pointless that I care about how their attitudes affect their future life.Since they don't care,then I don't care lo...I don't want to suffer myself from thinking about their matters.I have no right to control their lives and I'm not the one who supposed be responsible to their lives.Therefore,I should do my own job well,responsible to my job and my life,that's all.

I remembered one Chinese proverb suddenly:Do not be angry about others' fault（何必为别人的过错而生气呢？）.That means I have done nothing wrong,why should I being angry? I shouldn't be angry what,is their attitude problems,not mine.

Hey,kids.If I really say something make you upset ar,sorry...I just want to speak out my feeling here,otherwise I'll get crazy due to keeping too much unhappy things inside my heart XD

I remember one dialogue from Hong Kong drama:This is not your fault,it's fault of the society (这个不是你的错，是社会的错！）So,I'll blame nobody...

How long?

Originally you said I could postpone my plan,now totally changed my plan.No more accountant job ;better don't study anymore:;be a teacher....

I have to follow your plan: be a teacher for 5 years with having salary of $12oo only;wait for you earn more money to buy house n car;marry me;find a new living place;be a teacher and giving tuition......

While I can't change your mind,I must change my thinking.Otherwise,we'll quarrel again and again.I'm tired on quarreling on the same issue.What I can do is delete my plan and accept your plan!

Alright,can!Hopefully you don't control my life,otherwise I don't know how long I can stand it and do something hurts you.I have tolerated with it,please don't change again.Don't force me,I'll going to be crazy.I'm full of pressure of your hegemonic,I felt very stressful,can't even breath anymore.Please don't change again!

Finally....

Finally,our problem was solved.Both of us just have to change our plans a bit,therefore the problem between us was solved.

After this incident,I realized that I must have more conversation with him.Sometimes there is something happens between us is due to my thinking of "I thought....".Mostly,I'm the one who hurt others.

When the hurt comes out,I only realize that I have hurt somebody else.That's my mistake and my fault because of not enough sensitive and understanding. I should think more and more before I make a decision or doing something.

I must thank him because he tells me about my mistake.Without his honest,I think I'll hurt him more and others as well.Now I'm trying to control my brain and mouth before I take action.It takes time because different situation different way to talk and decide.

I hope that I can make it.I know that it's impossible to please everyone but I'll try to minimize the hurt I bring to others.My friends,maybe it was late to apologize about my mistake.Yet I still want to say :I'm sorry,my friend.I really didn't meant it.If I have done something that hurt you all,I'm very sorry about that.

Behind my plan

My 1st plan have done,what I can do now is waiting for my next year and start studying.

Yet,my decision for studying ACCA course brought a new problem between me and him.
In my plan,after I study for 5 months and pass the 1st paper,then I'll start to find an accountant job.I want to learn how to do the account things while I'm studying it ,I think it'll be very helpful in my future career.

If I can do well in my ACCA course and very interested in doing accounts,then I go further to reach higher level.But this is just my expectation,maybe I can't make it and give up in half way.

If I really being an accountant,I do not have much time to be with him because of different off days.
He felt very upset when I told him about my plan and my expectation.He wants to be with me always,see each other always,go shopping and watching movies together.....

Maybe I have given him wrong meaning and wrong information,so he thought I didn't care about our relationship and future happy memories.Actually I do care about it,but I didn't show it through my face.I hope I can balance my love and career at the same time,but I know sometimes I have to sacrifice something when I want to get something.

I thought as our love is still there,no matter how short time we can be with each other,our relationship will not getting worse also.But he was afraid that we would getting far apart from each other as we were busy with our own career relatively.

My study schedule crushed his off days.In short,my plan ruined his plan.He asked me whether I can be a teacher but not an accountant.Teachers have a lot of holidays,so he has much time to travel with me and being with me always.I understand his meaning,but I have paid the fee.Can I give up without trying?I just want to try a different working area since I'm still young and still have the passion on trying new things.If I realize that I'm not suit in doing accountant job,I still can go away from it and find another job.

Being a teacher is okay to me because I have experience in teaching and I love to share my knowledge with the kids.Furthermore teachers have a lot of holidays as well,can do many things as they like.He asked me why don't I take teacher training course.If I being a teacher,I have to take part time teacher training course,when the rest having school holidays,I have to study.That means I do not have school holidays until I pass the training course.

I didn't tell him about what'll happen if I take teacher training course because my mind was stuck. If I tell him more,more problem will come out.

I want to have my career,but I don't want to lose him at the same time,can I? I know there will be a way to solve this problem,but this time I really have no idea and helpless.

a lot of plan....

I have a lot of plan got to do...
1. Application for the ACCA ( document preparation and bankdraft)
2. Check out whether I can apply PTPTN loan for my ACCA course ( if can,hohoho,so good,man~!)
3. Earning more money for my daily expenses
4. Find a part time job ( if I have extra time)

The next two plans are not so important,but I guess I'll do it if I have extra money,hehehe~
5. Wisdom teeth extraction ( I have 4 wisdom teeth, but the dentist said it was not necessarily to extract them)
6. Get a new look of myself~!

Hahahaha...

纯粹发泄

现在的孩子们喜欢聊天，就算只是废话，也能聊到天南地北。。。当然我也会如此，不同的是我会看场合。

然而80后的孩子好像少了些自制和自律，当然不是每个孩子都这样。。。但是我遇到的好像几乎都那样子，看到他们的行为有时候真的是幼稚得可以，不知道应该觉得好气还是好笑。。。

看到他们仿佛每天在挑战我的容忍限度，有时真的觉得很累，好像比照顾小朋友还累。也许我跟现在的青少年格格不入，跟他们没缘份；不管我怎么说，感觉就像丢石入海，就听到‘嗵’一声，过后就不了了之了。。。

之前我还会为他们现在的性格会导致他们未来的生活如何，而感到苦恼；现在回想起来，论身份，我还没有那个资格，因为我只是他们的过客。

他们的生活应该由他们自己负责任，我已经尽了一位老师应该尽的本分和责任。我对我的工作负责任，至于他们，就要看他们自己的造化了。

Headache....

Originally I have chosen the LCCI for my study course,but there is no LCCI course in the college which I wish to study. So,ACCA and ICSA will be my next choice....

Mathematics is included in ACCA,but I have no account basic skill...I doubt whether I can handle it...ICSA is about business management,business law,business accounting,etc...sounds not bad...Oh,gosh~! I don't know how to choose....T.T

I heard that ACCA is a tough subject...I have been threw my school bag almost 1 year,I don't know whether I can catch up what lecturers teach and those tough lessons...Yet no doubt that no matter what course I take,I still have to put a lot of efforts and super-duper hardworking on it...

Hopefully I'll not give up easily when I confront a lot of problems and obstacles...Please take the laziness away from me,I don't want to fail my studies and my papers because of it....VICKY,you must be STRONG ~!